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Arrangements For Children
Like adults, children respond in different ways to separation and divorce. How they react often depends on the child's age, temperament and the level of conflict or cooperation between the parents.
It is better for both children and parents if the arrangements for children can be made by agreement between the parents. You are more likely to stick to something you have agreed to, rather than something that has been decided for you. When considering arrangements, your focus needs to be what will be best for your children. It is natural to feel anxious or fearful about your child spending time away with the other parent, but the reality is that following separation, children will have to spend time in two homes. Your children¿s adjustment to these changed circumstances will be easier if you can encourage their relationship with the other parent.
In making arrangements for a child or children, lawyers and the courts once used terms such as guardianship, custody and access. These terms have been replaced by more child focused descriptions such as "lives with", "spends time with" and "communicates with". For example, an arrangement once expressed as "the father shall have sole custody of his son John", will now say,"John will live with his father".
Whatever wording the courts use, arrangements for children after separation most often come down to two basic questions:
- What time will children spend with each parent, for example, alternating weeks, say, from Friday to Friday with each parent or each alternate weekend; and
- Who will make decisions about the children lives, for example where they go to school, their religious and cultural upbringing and the family name they will adopt
Over recent years there has been significant change in the way the law works. Long held presumptions that lead to children spending most of their time with one parent and more limited time with the other parent (often every second week end and half school holidays) have been changed. It does not however mandate that children must spend equal time with both parents, but it does encourage both parents to be involved in all areas of their children's lives as much as possible.
The cornerstone for making arrangements for your children is to identify, and to meet, their needs. One of those needs is to receive the continuing care and support of both parents. Children will worry less if you can agree about what is going to happen to them and explain why.
Another consideration is how to share the costs of raising your children. For information about child support click here for the Child Support Agency's website where you will find comprehensive information about child support obligations.
If you would like to make an appointment so that we together can achieve the best possible outcome for your children, please call us on 1300 368 258 or click here
